Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Day 3:1

On the dawn of the third day I had grown completely thin.

My hair had also grown long, and so had my fingernails and toenails. My body produced a smell as though it had been driven for years without bathing. It was truly pungent.

I knew that above all I had to teach this great meditation diet to others. To share its marvelous power and to see those encased in their wombs of fat freed to be something so much more. To truly know their bodies. To not live in dualistic denial.

To see the many freed.

But why did my body yearn for this so strongly.

What beckoned to me to be so connected. My state was perfection. I was in perfect harmony with every cell in my body. I could hear clearly in my mind the melody that causes enzymes to dance. I could feel the charges of each individual molecule in my temple, and I could transcend so many of the limitations of time.

I knew that the search for the muses revealed the only possible great cause in life. Yet I yearned, even now for others. To save others. To see others transformed and reborn, fully aware of their own flesh.

As the sun rose I slowed down time again.

I felt the tender wash of the photons cause the gentle release of my pineal gland. My third eye. Once thought of my Descartes to be the throne of the human soul.

I slowed it down more and more, beyond the perception speed of my eyes. I embraced the great and terrible nanosecond.

And then without warning I was moving backwards through time.

There was something automatic about my regress. Though as a scientist I know that my only true power was to escape the automatic in all regards, to become a creature of pure will, right down to the organelles of my cells. Yet this was automatic.

Like a reflex, the seconds moved backwards. Slowly at first. I felt my nails and hair begin to shorten. Then it sped up more, and more, and more increasing velocity at a rapid state. With horror I felt the fat cells swell with the excess of the horrible hydrocarbon tails of fat, only the automatic grip of this demonic time travel prevented me from flexing at an ultra-rapid rate to escape this cocoon.

In flashes that felt like lashes of a whip I relived my divorce, my marriage, my education, my adolescence. This was my first clue.

I landed in my adolescence like a meteorite giving birth to a crater. Yet my will was meaningless. The causal sea had already taken its grip. It was as if I was in a stranglehold of inertia. I had to relive it as I had done so in the first place.

At least in my youth I was thin again.

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